I remember my first day of my doctoral program like it was yesterday…
I entered Rutgers newly minted academic buildings eager to begin what I had anticipated to be my most difficult endeavor to date. I walked into the learning space, reacquainting myself with familiar faces from orientation, and settled on a table tucked away on the side of the room. Our professor welcomed us with open arms and invited us to introduce ourselves and what our dissertation topic was going to be (at that moment in time).
Cue record player scratching.
I hadn’t even been in the room for more than thirty minutes and I was being asked to drop an elevator speech as to what my research interests were?! I thought we were going to be able to sit down and flesh out our ideas with someone who was much more knowledgeable than myself… Since that moment in time, where I had a lump the size of a softball in my throat, I’ve taken 10 courses, earned 30 credits, and most recently begun year two of what should be a three-and-a-half-year journey.
In that time, I’ve endured my fair share of student struggles, but I’ve also forged bonds with educators and people alike that will last a lifetime. I’ve also developed my abilities as a student educator, and human exponentially, all while having an absolute blast. While there are some parallels between a Ph. D. and an Ed. D. program there are some vast differences, many of which go unaddressed on the internet. Noticing a gap in the literature I decided to start to fill it. Here are my confessions of a first-year Ed. Doc. Student.
Confession #1 – Obtaining your doctorate is equivalent to running a marathon, not a sprint.
While I don’t necessarily have the first-hand experience of taking part in a marathon, by the looks of it, it seems to be an extremely grueling, arduous test of mental and physical fortitude. The same can be said for the doctoral journey. There are going to be an innumerable amount of instances where you where you are simply exhausted, overwhelmed, and unmotivated, operating under the adage, “I’ll just take a nap instead!”
Do it. Seriously. Give yourself time to process and think through the information you are receiving. You are going to be processing and digesting information at a much more accelerated rate than you are used to. Allow yourself and your mind to dive deeply into the ideas being conveyed in the literature and set realistic expectations for yourself. Understanding what your optimal learning environment is will allow you to develop the endurance you need to successfully finish this marathon in an appropriate amount of time.
A colleague of mine, during one of those strenuous and overwhelming moments of the semester, shared a story with us to remind us that we’re human.
I used to be an avid runner and I will never forget this one race. I was about 3/4 of the way through a particularly grueling half marathon and I was struggling. Thousands of runners around me looked in much better shape, faster, and more prepared. I beat myself up for not training harder or being ready. As I ran through, I passed a woman holding up a poster that said, “they are just as tired as you are”. I can’t fully describe how much I laughed and loved that sign at that moment, or how I apply that to so many other things.
So when you sit in class and you feel like you’re the only who’s not an expert in theoretical frameworks, or the only one who doesn’t have their dissertation topic planned and ready to go, or the only one who hasn’t finished their assignment, remember, there are plenty of others who feel just as overwhelmed, underprepared, or out of their league as you. (Thaddeus, 2017)
Confession #2 – Be prepared for learning overdose.
Just as you can train and prepare for a marathon, nothing can truly prepare you for that moment your body and mind start to beg for a break and you need to summon raw mental strength and grit to get you to the finish line. Yes, while you may be able to simply “complete” each assignment and proceed through your coursework as though their checkpoints, eventually this strategy will catch up with you and hindsight is always 20/20 – I know what you’re thinking, the second doctorate will be much easier…
That being said, there will always be more readings, more assignments, more everything. The best analogy I can contrive is the amount of learning you will experience in a doctoral program is similar to a cartoon where the character opens a door which leads to a room with 10 more doors and so on and so forth. My best piece of advice (and something I learned as an undergraduate) is to ignore your grade and embrace the essence of learning – learning simply for the sake of learning. Pure knowledge acquisition. Besides, when you finally accomplish this milestone, who’s really going to ask you what your GPA was?
Enjoy the experience and soak it up like a sponge!
Confession #3 – Don’t think for a second your dissertation topic needs to be set in stone when you begin the journey.
When I had applied to the program I had expressed interests of exploring the success rate of the flipped classroom model in urban mathematics classrooms. Well, that idea was short-lived and I was once again, overwhelmed because there I was, surrounded by educators who seemed to have their dissertation written from the jump and here I am, twiddling my thumbs. What did I do? I took a nap…just kidding. I ASKED FOR HELP and boy did I get it. My first professor asked me quite possibly the most important question throughout my entire experience…
What about education keeps me up at night?
That question triggered a deep self-reflection about what my core values were as an educator and the change that I hoped to enact within my context. Not to mention, you will read so much literature that you identify with and are passionate about during your learning experience. Allow it to guide the construction of the long, winding road towards completing your dissertation. Don’t be deterred by some of the stones – developing a particular style of learning, forgetting some things that you read, being conflicted about switching your topic altogether – that you may trip on along the way. As long as your topic is relevant and worthwhile to YOU, then run with it. Trust in your abilities and your passions – they won’t steer you wrong.
Confession #4 – Don’t let the program consume you.
Everyone pursuing their Ed. D. is a practitioner – we are already dedicating much of our energy to improving the organization that we call home, it’s probably part of the reason why you’re trying to obtain your doctorate, to begin with! With everything you do during your day gig and spending sometimes 3 or 4 nights a week in class, there isn’t much time left for you, friends, or family. It is very important to understand how much out of class time you need to dedicate in order to be successful. Our first professor was very insightful and said something else that resonated with me.
The goal of an Ed. D. program is not for you to finish with two D’s – doctorate and divorce – only one.
And she meant it. This program will not only strain you but those around you who aren’t necessarily cognizant of the amount of time and energy the program demands. Cue them in and invite them to be a vital part of the journey! Bow-Tie Joe is not married…well technically I am to mathematics but she’s very understanding and supportive of all of my endeavors. All jokes aside, I have a younger brother that this program has stripped away much of my time from. There will always be an additional article that I could read, a class that I should have attended, or corner of a library I should be eroding away in. But there won’t always be moments in time to disconnect and create memories with loved ones. Take a vacation, make time to go on a spontaneous adventure, and do whatever it is you need to do to mentally reset, trust me. The program isn’t going to feel slighted or jaded that you didn’t show up for one class – you shouldn’t either.
Confession #5: Find your tribe.
I’m blessed. The program that I’m enrolled in at Rutgers University is built upon a cohort model, which brings together this smorgasbord of knowledge, skills, and experience. Even more important is that cohort programs naturally build community and are amazing at subduing feelings of isolation and solitude. Whether your program is centered around a cohort or not, it is critical to establish a support system for when the going gets tough. As a cohort, we celebrate the small victories – finishing a course, promotions, birthdays, etc. They also insisted I encourage you to create a Facebook page where you take great pride and satisfaction in posting witty memes to make the torture, I mean time, pass by. Within my concentration, which is a total of six people, we find victory in accomplishing assignments and progressing through the semesters together. I honestly don’t know if I’d be able to maintain my sanity throughout this program had it not been for the love, support, and laughter I receive from the amazing women in my concentration. Whatever it may be, cherish it and the people who are a part of the journey. I know personally that I wouldn’t have been able to enjoy this experience as much as I am had it not been for the amazing people you see pictured above and below.
In addition to your colleagues in the program, don’t forget about your professors who you’ll come to work alongside as you complete your dissertation. While we may consider them the gurus of knowledge (and keeper of grades if you see it that way) they are also a very vital part of your journey and are extremely eager in supporting you in all of your endeavors, both academically and personally.
Bow-Tie 20% Tip
This last segment isn’t necessarily a confession but more so some tips and strategies for paying for your doctoral degree. The first option I would encourage everyone to look into is loan forgiveness. Being a secondary mathematics teacher in a Title I organization for at least five years will shave off almost $18,000 off the bill! Even if you aren’t one of the educators eligible for the $17,500 loan forgiveness, you can still receive $5,500 off and hey, if it’s free it’s for me!
Secondly, something that most people don’t necessarily consider (and sometimes are based on financial need) are scholarships offered by the university or the program that you are enrolled in. Most of them require an essay on a particular topic in education and completion of the dreaded FAFSA, but hey if that’s what it takes for some potential free money, sign me up!
Another option to consider is maximizing your organization’s tuition reimbursement policy. Some districts pay out a particular amount based on per employee enrollment while others operate under a first come, first serve procedure or require a particular amount of years of service for a return on investment. Whatever option your organization offers, be realistic about the money you will receive. It is easy to put yourself in a financial hole if you are expecting a few thousand dollars and the organization’s reimbursement policy isn’t structured in your favor.
Something else very much outside of the box is perhaps looking to become a part-time instructor within the university. In doing so you may able to defray the cost of pursuing your doctorate. I have been told that if you teach at least two or courses at Rutgers University as a part-time instructor a semester you are eligible for 25% off the bill for your degree, not a bad trade-off.
Last, and most certainly not least, is transferring credit in from a previous graduate degree. I was fortunate to have one class transferred into my program while I know some colleagues with administrative degrees who were able to transfer in up to three classes! That’s about $6,500 plus time and energy! WIN-WIN!
Oh and perhaps establishing a feasible savings plan a few years before you begin your journey may be a viable pathway to consider. This is me operating under the assumption that you aren’t trying to take out any federal or private loans to pay for your degree.
Use the code “bowtiED” on Twitter to receive a free one-hour consultation on how to map out your doctoral endeavors…just kidding, email me, DM me, call me, get in contact with me however you please. Embarking on a doctoral journey is by no means meant to be a solo mission. We win together and Bow-Tie Joe is here for you!
Thanks for reading and sharing!